#61 Premature Estimation

To understand just how little guidance real women get when questing after skincare solutions, one need only recall the recent frenzy for Boots No 7 Protect & Perfect - with thousands of people (the men all apparently buying for partners) diving to get their hands on the latest 'elixir of youth.' What this serum had, that far fewer anti-ageing counterparts have been subject to, was some TV time behind it - forming part of a much-watched Horizon documentary shown late last year. So, can anyone even remember the facts behind the product? Or has hype overtaken sense yet again?

To recap, laboratory tests were headed up by an expert dermatologist - who tested No 7 Protect & Perfect and deemed it to be effective at combating sun damage.

Ah. If only it were that simple. The fact is, the test was a very small one involving just 9 volunteers... oh, and it was carried out on their forearms - not their faces.

Following the results of the initial 'HORIZON' experiment, the dermatologist (Professor Chris Griffiths), has since initiated a six-month double-blind clinical trial, involving 60 volunteers: “We are giving the cream to 30 people to use on their faces and a normal moisturiser to 30 more as a placebo. At present we are about halfway through the trial, although we have not started assessing the results yet.”

So, this is the real test. I mean, it involves actual people's faces, which is a good place to start when trying to assess whether or not a face cream works...

Of course, cosmetics companies aren't stupid. If they are to claim significant 'skin-healing' benefits that border on pharmaceutical, it would then be necessary to subject said products to an enormous battery of expensive tests that could take years. Our governing bodies might allow cosmetics companies free reign over their own research (which is not to say that most companies don't carry out impressive, stringent and exhaustive tests - well, would you risk the lawsuit?!) but pharmaceutical companies do not get the same grace - which is why we now have the frustratingly wooly term, cosmeceutical, being used to describe cosmetics with 'pseudo-pharmaceutical' benefits - a word which has, of course, been invented by the cosmetics companies themselves.

The galling thing about the No7 debacle is not that it isn't a good product. It might well be - and yes, the forearm cells of those 9 volunteers did show elevated levels of two proteins within the skin that ensure its elasticity - but we're talking about 9 people, 9 forearms - and this is all it takes to spark a 6million-&-counting shopping frenzy?

Perhaps it's got something to do with the number 7? The latest craze? The Athena 7 Minute Face Lift (currently being snatched from Harvey Nick's shelves faster than I can type the word 'HYPE') - which contains nothing more than a blend of organic essential oils (although, there are 12 of these, not 7 - that would've been freaky).

I have a pot here and will happily send it to the first person who emails in and is interested in testing it. Why haven't I bothered myself? Because I don't need my reflection to tell me that a pot of cream cannot make me look 18 again. It might be wonderful, it might be the holy grail of face masks, it might take my mug from corned beef to fillet steak, but it will most certainly not make me look as though I have had a facelift. My omniscient beauty ed's ego might be a bit inflated, I'll admit that - but I guarantee it won't be anywhere near as inflated as these readily proliferated product claims. So there.

#60 Helping Husband

I attended a wedding last month, where my friend's husband - extremely cute in a Mark Owen/Richard Hammond/James McAvoy sort of way - looked utterly dreadful. Bless him. Red eyes, dark circles, patchy skin and a little breakout on the chin. The couple spent several hours on the night regaling guests with stories of just how insomniac, anxious, busy and run down they'd become in the run up... she on the other hand looked flawless, because, as is a bride's right, she'd chosen to have a professional hair and make-up artist transform her from under-fed and hollow-eyed, to glistening cheekboned and ruby-lipped. She might have missed a few winks, but there were no missed opportunities amidst the menfolk, who flocked to her like moths to Greta Garbo's ember-tipped cigarette - she'd never looked better. A few weeks later, I quizzed her on the routine and it came as no surprise that on the morning of the wedding she'd used a cleanser, exfoliator, two masks, eye patches, a calming oil and massage technique (borrowed from her facialist) and then had several primers, highlighters and bases expertly blended and applied by her premier artist. As for her hubby - who's since bounced back to his charming ways - he rolled out of bed after a mere 25 minutes sleep, washed, shaved and patted on moisturiser - hoping for the best, but feeling somewhat hollow and harrowed by the puffy-eyed man looking back at him in the mirror.

This is where I become exasperated. Had he known just three or four simple tricks (his wife was in no position to help, sleeping as they did in separate parts of the country the night before) - he could have fixed his face with minimal fuss and spent the night with chest puffed out, rather than deflated in self-conscious apology.

Having chatted to several of my best-looking and well kempt colleagues, I feel the need to share the following...

1) If you have had no sleep the night before and need to look your best, be gentle with your skin. Overzealous cleansing, exfoliating and shaving will leave your complexion looking as you feel: irritable.

2) A few basics: if your skin is calm, but just looks dull and tired, invest in an enlivening, radiance-enhancing product, such as Nickel Morning After Rescue Gel, £24 (www.nickelspalondon.co.uk) - do not use immediately after shaving.

3) If your skin looks dry and patchy, after cleansing try a mask that will even out skintone such as Dermalogica Multi-Vitamin Power Recovery Mask, £21.35 (hqhair.com).

4) If you have dark circles around your eyes, couple an eye gel or cream with light-reflective properties (my brother loves Lab Series Age Rescue Eye Therapy, £25 (hqhair.com) ) with a concealer. Many will know that I'm not a big fan of YSL's Touche Eclat - and on men in particular, it's very easily spotted (especially when looking back at photographs!). I therefore recommend Laura Mercier Secret Concealer, £18, because it comes in three SKIN-like colours and blends in seamlessly. For best results, apply eye cream and while skin is still the tiniest bit spongey with moisture, tap the concealer all along the orbital bone (the hollowest part of the undereye) with a little finger. When blended, stop.

5) There is no treatment on earth that will get rid of spots instantly. If you are well-off and well-connected, you can book in for an emergency spot shot from a reputable dermatologist(otherwise known as a cortisone injection), but for mere mortals, DIY methods must suffice. I don't rate toothpaste at all - I've seen girls with red rashes after regular zit attacks with the stuff.

If you have no time to spare, my best advice is to take a teeny bit of aspirin, grind it up and add a bit of water to make a paste and dab it directly onto the spot. Leave for a a couple of minutes then rinse away with ice cold water. This will take down some swelling and redness. Another great option is to pop eye whitening drops, which constrict blood vessels thereby reducing blood flow (and redness), directly onto the spot. My current favourite blemish cover-up is Avene Couvrance Concealer Brush, £11 (boots.com). It is a pen-style applicator and comes in a beige and a green shade. If you can afford both, I'd recommend using the green concealer on red areas first, before blending, and then brushing the beige colour over that. Faffy it may be, but the formula blends down to utter invisibility and has never once felt heavy on my cake-prone skin.

Poor guys. I may not be receptive to the ongoing male battle to keep tools in trousers, but I'm certainly more than sympathetic should they choose to whip the odd trick out of their sleeves.

#59 The Good Stuff

So, last time I took a poke at the CRAP TRAP pile. Now, for the GOOD STUFF:

1. First up, apologies are due. I didn't give Stella McCartney's CARE line much of a chance - well, actually I did, I just didn't use it properly. You see, I've never believed the regime nonsense i.e. that using all products from a single line is more beneficial than mixing and matching - but I often overlook the fact that within certain lines, the products are designed to be used together (especially if high in active ingredients). Such is the case with CARE. I added the elixirs and 5 Benefits Cream to my Spiezia/Dermalogica/Liz Earle-rich routine, and well, I was less than blown away. Well, last week, I went back to basics (again) - and started using the CARE cleanser, toner, elixir and moisturiser - morning and night. Well, would you believe it, I've not heard a peep out of my skin in 14 days. It's clear, hydrated, soft, unshiny, comfortable and even has a mid-summer glow to it. I'm converted and, tail between legs, apologetic. From my utterly subjective standpoint, I think I've found my new skin resolution.

2. Jurlique Intense Recovery Mask. Beauty eds are always questing after something - the perfect red lippy, the undereye concealer, the invisible base - but for me, the journey's been rather more specific. I've been searching for a mask that will simultaneously hydrate, purify, calm, clarify and revitalise. I've tried masks that meet all but one essential criterion (Dermalogica Multi-Vitamin Power Recovery Mask e.g. does a lot, but offers no purification/clarification benefits) - but never have I found a tube that multi-masks effectively. Then the lovely Purple PR ladies sent me this baby. Wowzer. It's chocka with everything from Carrot Root and Green Tea extract to Rose Hip and Evening Primrose Oil - but crucially, it's also rich in Green Clay - so while it's hydrating, it's also vaccuuming out pores and tackling imperfections. I had it on for ten minutes yesterday and massaged it off with a warm muslin cloth - skin was rosy, even and plump. Very impressed with this one.

3. Colgate Total Professional Weekly Clean. It looks like a toothpaste, it tastes like a toothpaste, it smells like a toothpaste. But for some reason (and the flashy lettering on the packet gives us a clue - 'with an ingredient that professional dentists use!!!'), a five minute scrub with this concoction leaves my mouth feeling like I've just had a clean and polish, minus the freaky rubber gloves and panic-inducing surroundings. There are no drastic changes in the appearance of the teeth - they just look very clean - but the sensation it produces is really rather good.

So, on this very last day of 2007, that is it from me.
What's coming in 2008 - hey, I'm a beauty editor, what do you think's coming....?
A........ makeover........... of course!

#58 Premature Resolution

Oh lordy it's happening again. First came the spring-cleaning (which began with the last spoonful of Xmas pud & cream being scraped into the dustbin), then came the wardrobe haulage (all unsuitable, unseasonable items are now zipped up in a John Lewis storage bag in the loft) and today, I waged war on the buckling shelves and burgeoning storage units in my study. There's something about the end of the year that sends me off into a bout of relentless navel gazing. I analyse my life, my home, my space, my skin. Then I start clearing out. Chucking bits of paper I've stashed safely all year, ripping apart magazines that have been stood in chronological order since time immemorial (otherwise known as the day I moved into my new flat) and sifting through boxes of beauty bumph that I've not yet had time to try, nor been able to offload on friends and family - trying to work out what on earth I'm supposed to do with it all. Here's an idea - if there is anyone out there who runs a legitimate charity and can make good use of unwanted, unused and unopened beauty products then please, drop me a line and fill me in on your proposal. Ta very much.

Whilst sifting - which took me the best part of 4 hours - I ended up with three distinct piles: The crap that no one would ever want; the stuff that I don't want, but someone else might love and the gems I'm saving for myself, just in case I ever manage to grow myself another face or five, and will thereby find good use for.

Tomorrow I shall regale you with the good stuff.
Tonight, I'll serve up the unsatisfactory:


CRAP TRAP
I have a mate who loves J-Lo's, Paris', Coleen's and Gwen's scents. There's nowt snobby about her - and she always sniffs it like it is. But Alex by OK! Magazine sent her running for the nearest door. Words used? Sweet, cloying, air-freshener, headache-inducing - like one's first sniff of an early 90s incarnation of Impulse. The bottle's about as classy as Jordan on the pull too. Wrinkle-inducing grimaces abound.

The mineral foundation revolution. Anyone would think skincare companies had found a cure for cancer with all the harping on that's been done about these curious pots of powder. The fact is, the vast majority of the mineral formulas out there are sadly lacking in purity. Many of them (including L'Oreal's True Match Mineral Foundation) contain one or more dodgy additions, such as Diazolidinyl Urea (a common irritant) and Bismuth Oxychloride (neither of which are found in nature), so the 'go to sleep in it, wake up with better skin' myth, is in most cases just that - MYTH. Be wary and always check the labels before parting with your hard-earned cash.

My other peeve is that I've not yet tried a mineral powder that looked great on my skin. I'll start by saying that I've never ever worn face powder - hey, if my nose shines, so be it - so I'm not used to seeing a veil of dust on the skin, which tends to gather around my eyebrows and cheeks, where I have a wee bit of peach fuzz. But at least with face powder you can get away with just a swish over the T-Zone, but if you choose a mineral powder foundation, you're supposed to be able to use it everywhere - under eyes, over spots, atop chins - and it's often marketed as being a foundation-and-concealer-in-one too. Problem is, wherever you put it and however well you blend, it's always partially VISIBLE, which as far as I'm concerned, is cardinal base sin #1.

There may be others in the future that I love - I've saved a couple of pots for new year dalliances - but for the timebeing, at this stumped-out, fag-end of 2007, they're in the NOT HOT POT... going, going, gone.

#57 Beauty Duty

It's late. It's been too long. I've missed this. I'm sorry for the silence.
Here, with no waffle - unheard of for me - is my current hit & miss list:

UPPERS

Uriage Stick Levres. Discovered at a French pharmacy - smells like a mix between Chapstick original and Chapstick Cherry, but with a far more moisturising, long-lasting, pleasing texture. Smiles.

Botanics Organics Jojoba Body Oil & Laidbare Body Oil. I've been putting on three coats a day - which you can, as they're both pleasingly inexpensive - the former has no scent (no essential oils) - just simple, fuss-free, skin-softening power; the latter is yummily-scented with essential oils, but also contains five EFA rich oils including Rosehip and Evening Primrose. This is the softest my skin's been in any winter in living memory.


DOWNERS

Not loving the Liz Earle Brightening Mask. It might give an instant perk-up, but I always seem to look oilier the next day. Hmmmm.


Dermalogica Soothing Eye Make-Up Remover.
Is it just me, or does this make anyone else's eyes sore? The viscousy gel always gets into my eyes - I prefer liquids - and I'm yet to be left with refreshed, soothed peepers.

And while we're on the subject of Dermalogica, I've also recently had a bad reaction to their Climate Control Lip Therapy. Lips felt more sore and became slightly swollen after repeated use. Uh Oh. This is the second bad reaction I've had to their products - the Body Cream brings me out in the most appalling, bumpy, red, raised angry rash - can't touch the stuff. It smells rather vile too. Despite this, several of their skincare products are eternal favourites (I heart Total Eye Care & Daily Microfoliant) - which has taught me never to expect great results from every product in a promising line.

You win some, you lose some.
You might get a bit messed up along the way (blotchy, rather than pillowy lips did not invite Mr M's late-night attentions), but hey, it's all the line of duty.

#56 Eye Fidelity

Sometimes an email pinpoints the collective mood. For some reason, this month, it's been all about the eyes and I've had a slew of emails from Truth in Beauty readers, all of whom are seeking a solution to their shadowy lids and burgeoning bags. Most of whom, swapping and shifting from cream to gel, have been continually disheartened by the many ineffectual eye products on the market.

The truth? Open your eyes. Don't expect miracles. Dark circles will not disappear overnight - if ever! My response? Cast your eyes below...

"I don't believe that dark circles can be cured with an eye cream. For most people, dark circles are either a sign of lack of sleep, poor microcirculation or they are hereditary. If it's lack of sleep - there's only one way to cure it; if it's poor microcirculation, then it's the application of the product that is most beneficial - try a daily massage of the eye area, tapping along the brow bone from the inner to the outer corners of the eye with your ring fingers; and if it's hereditary, then you have two options - a great concealer or a cosmetic procedure, possibly one that involved fillers, which would temporarily plump up any undereye hollows and thereby reduce the appearance of dark circles. Some studies have also been done that link dark undereye cirlces to iron or vitamin K deficiencies.

To reduce puffiness, the key thing is the temperature of the product. Any eye cream or lotion - such as Liz Earle Eye Bright (a make-up remover and soothing liquid) - will work far more effectively if it's kept chilled. Alternatively, two cotton pads dipped in icy cold water and then placed over eyes, or two fridge-cold cucumber slices/used camomile teabags, will take down puffiness more effectively than a specific depuffing eye cream.

I've tried quite a few eye creams in my time but always come back to Dermalogica Total Eye Care. It's got an SPF of 15, so it's great for daily wear, but the zinc oxide in it also reflects light to some degree, so subtly lightens the undereye area, whilst smoothing, hydrating and protecting it.

As for concealers, I personally like an all-in-one concealing & light-reflecting wand such as Dior's Skinflash, but I am aware that light-reflecting formulas don't provide very heavy-duty coverage. I've got a cousin who has more pronounced dark circles under her eyes and she swears by Kanebo's creamy concealer. It comes in a rectangular cream-coloured palette, with a mirror in the lid, and goes on very smoothly - blending easily too. It also provides excellent coverage. The other two undereye concealers I would recommend are Laura Mercier's Secret Concealer - once again, creamy, blendable and high coverage - and Armani's High Precision Retouch - more of a liquid, but with excellent coverage."

#55 O is for Organic

Lordy lordy lordy. Organic, schmorganic. It's everywhere. I'm getting about 20 new emails a week, proclaiming the benefits of this new preservative potion, talc-free make-up, puritanical product. I'm tired. My eyes hurt. The BRANDwagon is at buckling point. Yes, the marketeers have caught on to the fact that green is good, green is big and boy oh boy, green is where the green is. Ker-ching. Which pretty much explains the stuffed inbox. So what have I been trying? As mentioned in my last entry - Origins Organics and Jurlique. Jurlique are not new - but they have ditched the white and blue glass packaging in favour of a cleaner, fresher, self-explantory mode of packaging and product. I've used the Balancing Day Care Cream. It gets the thumbs up. It didn't do anything miraculous - but it did soothe and hydrate well. A small amount satisfied the entire face - it sunk in cleanly and didn't produce an exceptionally oily mid-afternoon result (just a bit of shine, which given that my skin lives in an artificially ventilated environment, is to be expected). The Daily Exfoliating Cream is the range's big hitter. The thing that the PRs say that they themselves couldn't live without. It's rather like the Dr Hausckha one - grainy, wholemealy, porridgey. You don't rub it in, but rather press it over skin, creating a popping suction with fingertips which is meant to draw out impurities, without scouring the skin. Hmmmmm. I've always had a thing for homemade exfoliators - things that look and feel as though you could've whipped them up in the kitchen - but experience has taught me that nothing beats a finely milled powder or an exfoliating mask such as REN's Glycolactic Skin Renewal Peel. I'm not sold on this one. My skin still had a few flakes left around the chin, which I had to buff away with a warm muslin cloth. Then there's Origins Organics. A big, new, simply packaged line that promises to be straightforward. In an interesting twist, it's printed it's organic percentages right on the front of the packaging - and it ranges from 73% in the Foaming Face Wash up to 98% in the Conditioning Hair Oil. There's no reason that organics will be any better for sensitive skin - in fact, a lot of sensitive skins flare up at first contact with essential oils - which are so often the staple of organic lines. I'm seriously prone to eczema on my body and have been using the Cleansing Body Bar for several weeks (it lasts a satisfyingly long time) and haven't seen a peep from my usual patches. It feels great whilst it's on the skin, but leaves a slightly too super-squeaky-clean feel afterwards - great though for those who hate it when their body washes leave an oily residue behind. I've yet to try the skincare - I've promised my skin a break from persistent testing - but have been using the Silky Spray Body Spritz and Conditioning Hair Oil. The former is tricky. Essential oils of clove, lavender, patchouli and thyme means that it has a very distinctive, enduring scent. Some days I love the scent - taking me back to student sex sessions in a jostick haze, but other days it makes me feel more like I've found myself in a trunk in the back of my local Oxfam. Mood dictates. It does feel mighty good though - not greasy in the slightest - and the milky texture sinks in nice n deep in seconds. The hair oil is ostensibly nothing special. It mixes sunflower, sesame and olive oil with a smattering of essential oils - peppermint is the one that stands out - and yes, it does make hair lovely and soft and shiny. But then, so would a cup of olive oil. Another thing - I'm not sure about the packaging. It's self-consciously plain. As though it's parading it's openness - at the press day I asked the PR when they'd replace the prototypes with final packaging. She told me this was it. Well, it ain't pretty, but Isuppose it ain't ugly either. And for a company that has always prided itself on clever names and cute packaging, it's very possibly a step in the right direction.