#84 What Goes Up...

Here is what has got me impressed:

Nivea SOS Lip Balm - good stuff this. More of a cream than an oily balm, it glides on, stays put for hours and provides tangible protection on blustery days. I like it a lot more than the Blistex Intensive Moisturiser, as the Nivea version does away with the mentholy sting & medicinal pong (and opts for a candy-sweet (though not cloying) scent instead).

Jemma Kidd Professional Team Collection - this lady has really got her act together and come up with a brand new line-up that puts to rights the problems with the former products. It's slicker, smarter, formulas work a lot harder, the packaging looks better and it has the well-thought-out feel of a premium line - hence it's new position in Space.NK (it will have left Boots stores by the end of Jan 09). The big hitters? The I-Perfector Prep & Brighten Duo - a double-ended pencil with a flesh toned eyeliner and concealer, both of which effectively cancels out redness and the I-Rescue Bio-Complex Cover - a skin-tinted treatment, concealer & brightener, which has that rare quality of actually buffing away shadows minus chalky crepeiness. Very nice indeed.

NEOM Organic Bath Oil: RESTORE - Two of my favourite essential oils, Jasmine & Sandalwood, are combined in this cosseting blend that has thrice pulled off a rare feat: making me smile at the end of a really, really crappy day. Two small capfuls in a big hot bath fills the room with fragrance, unknots the head, nourishes the skin and makes everything a bit more bearable. A lot to ask from a bath oil, but I'll be darned if this doesn't pull it off.

Here is what has got me depressed:

Urban Retreat The Cleanser - this formula really upsets me. It smells lovely, feels good on the skin, contains lots of thumbs-up ingredients...yet...yet...after just a few days use, I tend towards breakouts (having been clear for months) AND my skin takes on a slightly sensitized, prone-to-stinging feel (with heightened redness around the t-zone). There is definitely something in this pot that is not my face's friend. I do not like you either.

Aveda Damage Remedy Restructuring Shampoo - I LOVE this. BUT (and it's a really big but), after constant use my hair starts to take on the look and feel of the bottom of a ne'er washed chip pan. I rinse and rinse and rinse, but to no avail. It's the Jekyll & Hyde of my bathroom - sometimes producing shiny and bouncy locks; other times leaving me looking like a bedraggled extra from a street-scene in Oliver. I've taken to using it every other wash (rotating with Bumble & Bumble Blue Sundays Shampoo, which gets hair really clean). It's too good to ditch entirely though. How good? I've not had a split end in years...

#83 Just for starters...

Has anyone seen the latest Just For Men advert? Good lord. Two little girls, who the audience must assume have recently lost their mother, run up to their father and beg him to dye his hair in order that he might be able to face the world afresh and hopefully find a new partner. Father dyes his hair and gets a first date, during which he takes a picture of himself with 'prospective new wife' on the old camera phone (too keen? surely not?) which he then sends to his children, who appear to be home alone while he is out schmoozing. The giggling girls then jump up and down, giving one another high fives, overjoyed at the image of their father hugging a strange woman. Based on a true story. Hmmm.

What intrigues me most about the advert is the type of man it is supposed to appeal to. My husband, a modern (though not metrosexual) male, recoils each and every time it comes onto the TV and despite being beset by his first smattering of greys, the idea of besmirching his head with a product as out-of-touch as Just For Men (the Old Spice of the hair dye world) is far worse than a future of salt n pepper strands. I heartily agree with his logic. In fact, I'd be far less disturbed by the discovery of a hidden porn stash under the bed than I would be if I stumbled across a seedy (and heaven forbid, empty!) box of Just For Men.

As far as I can tell, the average man is far less likely to fall for inflated cosmetic claims than the average woman. The idea of precious diamond dust, amazonian plants, bio-chemical research, space-travel tests etc etc, might get women pulling out the platinum card (and sales statistics would seems to support this), but men, it seems, are not amused. They want high performance, yes, but minus hyperbole and gimmickry - and are suckers for slick, chic packaging that won't embarrass them should it fall out of the gym bag and into the middle of the men's locker room.

I canvassed a swathe of my most stylish male friends and here are the products that got their hearts-a-racing:

Shiseido Men Cleansing Foam
Clinique Pore Minimizer Oil Blotting Sheets
Lancome Men Ultimate Cleansing Gel
Dermalogica Daily Microfoliant
Clarins Men Fatigue Fighter

What do they have in common? Simple, modern design; practical application and handling; effective formulas with visible results and, of course, not a single, empty 'love or your money back' promise hinted at on the pack (or in any of the campaigns). Even if Lancome hadn't roped Clive Owen into the advertising act (and according to the aforementioned menfolk) this just for men lot would still be just the ticket.

#82 Music to make-up to...

Musico. Sometimes my alarm-clock-led life means that I can manage a week or more without listening to any music...not a note. When this happens, my mind and body begin to subconsciously crave a good song and the only antidote to my ensuing fidgety panic is an entire morning, hours on end, spent shuttling through my favourite tracks on my i-pod, filling my little flat with a pounding bass, transporting vocals and medicinal melodies. The day can be rainy, snowy, gusty or befogged, it doesn't matter... Midlake, Radiohead, Arctic Monkeys, Laura Marling and Vampire Weekend all have the power to coax me out of a stormy-weather or inner-storm-induced stupour. Music is my elixir and soul-saver, centering my head and heart once more, reminding me of what matters, how to smile, laugh and dance like Molly Ringwald in The Breakfast Club (I try my hardest, never quite pulled it off) and also helping me to forget that I'm old enough to know who Molly Ringwald is and how her Breakfast Club dance was literally the coolest thing I had ever seen. Like. Ever.

Then there's the way in which a good tune can verge on being alchemistic - banishing torpor, motivating me on the worst of days, instilling confidence even when I'm feeling self-conscious. Which is why I think the music you pick to make your face up to is just as important as the make-up itself. It helps to shape the face in the mirror long before you've rouged and contoured it, helps refocus the eyes, beckoning towards an inner Cyndi Lauper, Siouxsie Sioux, Blondie or Vanessa Paradis. For big nights out, my friends and I have a playlist - a set of cheeky tunes that often result in false lashes and glittery lids, other times in cherry lips and indigo liner... the tune, like a mystical snake charmer's melody, guiding the hand across the face in previously unstudied ways. I've made some regrettable mistakes and incredibly fun faux-pas over the years, all while listening to a battery of unsuitable tunes. Power ballads invariably coax out a Bonnie Tyler-esque 80s popstar; love songs a slightly too-powder-and-painted pretty girl; dance tracks an acid-trip teenager... but through trial and error I've honed a pretty perfect playlist - all the songs managing to achieve my main aim of a night out: feel good, feel like me, just a bit more adventurous, expressive, a bit braver...

The Arctic Monkeys: Fluorescent Adolescent - let your hair down, perfect a naughty smile

Muse: Supermassive Black Hole - sexy, bold and head held high

Justin Timberlake: What Goes Around - heroine (not heroin) chic with a dramatic dark eye

Anita Ward: Ring My Bell - Disco curls, ruby lips

A warm-up act to support the headliner, lipstick and lashes... and make your heart beat that little bit faster. Hey Mr DJ...

#81 The Price is Right

I've never been an avid watcher of the news, but of late, I've been even less inclined to sit in front of the daily bulletins, so demoralised have I been with our current state of economy (credit crunch, credit crunch, credit crunch), society (I live in the South East, which the news reports would have me believe is the new South Central LA) and culture (AKA the Brand and Ross debacle). Where has all the good news gone? We know that times are tough, belts are tight, banks are to blame, the government's in a squeeze and our former empire of an economy is now looking green around the gills and weak in the knees, but, where possible, life must still go on.

I'm not a big spender - I punctuate months of abstinence with the occasional end-of-season sale treat from net-a-porter - but in order to part with money at this time I feel as though the purchase must be both affordable and high-quality - but most importantly, it needs to deliver real value for money and something above and beyond the basics embodied by the price tag.

With this in mind:

Ruby + Millie are selling their Make-Up On The Go Travel Case for £25, as opposed to the normal £50. I've always liked their eye shadows and brushes and with this kit, you'll walk away with (I now revert to the press release): 10 eye colours, 5 lip colours, 4 metallic colours, 2 cheek colours, a highlighter, 5 make-up brushes in their own case, a cosmetic purse and a mirror. This will be beauty utopia for some, hell for others who prefer chic, downsized palettes to large, paintbox style trays - but regardless of personal preference, quality and value are both ticked by this beauty box. The offer is only valid from Friday 31st October - Thursday 6th November, at Boots.

The other notable 'credit crunch' offer comes courtesy of London salon WINDLE. On Tue 11th and Tue 18th November, they'll be serving up 'recession days', where absolutely everything under their roof will be sold at 50% off. Alongside cuts, colouring and treatments, it also includes Bumble and Bumble products and the full range of WAM electricals. WAM tools are great, by the way, in particular the anodized curling irons which come in five different barrel sizes. WINDLE is based at 41 – 45 Shorts Gardens, in Covent Garden. The number, if you fancy a chat, is 020 7497 2393.

So, there you go - my two top credit crunch tip-offs. That's as close as I'll ever get to advertising, but in these thrifty times, it feels right to share the wealth. And as Jamie Oliver might say - PASS IT ON!

#80 Happy Highs and Extraordinary Lows...

Here's another round-up of the best beauty loot that won't break the bank:

Bourjois Rouge Hi-Tech Lip Tint in Rouge Futuriste
I adore orangey-red shades for lips - from peachy corals to blood orange - and the first time I tried this I was seriously impressed. The first coat leaves nothing other than a sheer stain - the sort of colour my lips go after sipping on orange & carrot juice! - but build it up and by the third layer, this stain leaves lips with the sort of high-fashion hue that chimes perfectly between red and orange. Current, flattering and cool. I've worn it with a tan and while being pale as blotting paper - both times with compliment-inducing effect. The one downside is that it can wear off unevenly, staining the inner, more porous part of my lips for longer than the outer, smoother edges - which is why I keep the portable little pot on hand for touch-ups.

Urban Decay Iconic Lipstick in 5150
The packaging aims for 'high-design' (cough 'gimmicky' cough), but unfortunately it translates as weighty and cumbersome... thankfully, the entire range makes up in colour and texture what it lacks in practicality. My chosen muted cherry pink shade is the sort of bright, without being bold, colour that always manages to perk up the complexion. The hint of glitter doesn't work for everyone, but in a dimly lit bar where the subtle sparkle looks immensely flattering, it is just the ticket.

And from atop the fence...then over the other side...

There are a few brands that fit into my 'I'm just not sure about them' category. The ideas are strong, but execution is somehow lacking. Be it the packaging, the textures, the shades or just simply that they do not deliver - the following brands have yet to hit my mark:

New id Cosmetics
I like the ideas behind a lot of these products. i-groom, for example, is an angled, triangular-tipped pencil, that is well-shaped to fill in patchy brows, and also comes with a pleasingly grippy-bristled brush at the other end. However, when I opened mine for the first time, the pencil lead flew out, followed by the spring mechanism, and subsequent models have also proven a bit flimsy. I've also tried i-blush (once again a clever concept of a trio of contouring and highlighting cheek colours), but despite the 'finely milled powder' and 'Ipanema' promise, found them all slightly chalky and the color choice not particularly flattering on my pale golden skin.

Cosmetics a la Carte
Here is a clear case of a cosmetics company with a big, faithful fanbase, that could very much benefit from a revamp. Bases come in a wide range of shades - the ethos is 'made to measure make-up' - and the concealers are bestsellers thanks to their longwearing, but nicely blendable, formulas. But here's the rub - the packaging is plasticky, design is dated and much of it looks, well, cheap. The silver silken bags (think party favours) within which products are packaged does not do much to redeem them either. An unfortunate case of sufficient substance, but not enough style.


Virgin Vie...
Oh dear. I'm afraid that VV has become shorthand in beauty ed world for brands that miss the mark by a mind-bogglingly long way. This brand has SO much potential. Many of the formulas are fab - I remember testing the Skin Dew Primer some years ago and being rather impressed - but the general look of the products (particularly the make-up), is dated, dull and often illogical. I might be sued for libel here, but I'll risk it by saying that it looks as though VV have attempted to copy Estee Lauder's packaging (think navy blue with gold insignia), but have somehow produced something that looks more like Marks & Spencer. Regardless, there are clearly lots of ladies who love the line (the online business is booming) - even if the unphotogenic products rarely make it onto the pages of glossy magazines (or into my evening bag).

#79 Dream Creme

Ah. So. Well. I'm struggling for a start. You see, I feel as though I've been wrong-footed. In the months that I've been writing my blog, a trend seems to have developed. More often than not, my blog has been about the very best 'little-known' products vs the worst 'big branded' products. You see, as much as I enjoy using (and abusing should they miss the mark) the Lauders and Neutrogenas of the world, I've been consistently more impressed by the more specialist, home-grown brands - the Korners, Omoroviczas and Sarah Chapmans out there. Well, a couple of weeks ago the Creme de la Mer Press Office saw fit to send out a big pot of their famous Creme to a bunch of beauty editors who had, perhaps, forgotten all about the miracle broth and its reputed benefits. The delivery coincided with the end of my regular night cream, so, I thought, why not give the famous formula a whirl?

I spatula'd a tiny bit out, rubbed it between my fingers as instructed on the pot, and massaged it all over my face. Ordinarily, I'd steer well clear of such a rich formula (which does not claim to be chemical or paraben free). My skin's on the oily side of normal - but with the onset of winter, I've been waking up to a more dry patches than normal and thought that this was probably as good a time as any to try the Creme.

First things first. I rather liked the smell.
Secondly, it's really, shockingly, unctuous and thick - like old-school Nivea - and the smallest amount (for me, a globule the size of a couple of peas) covered my face and neck.
Thirdly, it needs to be patted and rolled over skin - you can't simply rub it in like a lotion, but I found that my skin absorbed it easily, and felt spongy and soft just minutes later.
Lastly, I was afraid that the heavy formula might encourage breakouts so used it sparingly over my nose and chin.

As it turns out, it's been two weeks and my skin is entirely clear, soft and dry-patch free. The dehydration lines to which I'm so often prone, on my forehead and on the left hand side of my mouth, have all but disappeared - making my complexion look visibly younger.

Let me stress, however, that it has not been long enough to see any anti-ageing benefits (although, to be annoyingly truthful, I'm still wrinkle- and crow's feet-free), but as far as bright, luminous and even skin goes, this has done the trick. Of course, there are a lot of creams out there that can buy you similar results, but, not many that when accidentally smeared over a patch of eczema manage to shrink it overnight. Hmmm, miracle broth? Perhaps there's some promise in this pot after all.

#78 Skipping Breakfast...

I've spent almost 30 years of my life washing my face before bed, then again upon waking. This twice-a-day routine has served me well and it never occurred to me to stop. Then, on a recent holiday, I packed insufficient cleanser. I'm in love with my cleanser, so was loathe to stock up on local pharmacy goods. So, I had no choice but to skimp on what I had and out went the morning cleanse. I ensured that my night-time wash was thorough (I'm a disciple of the whole muslin cloth & cleansing balm school of cleansing)and did nothing other than splash my face with warm, then very cold water a few times in the morning. Psychologically, I wasn't a big fan. I couldn't get over the feeling that my skin wasn't 'clean' - but, logically, it's a perfect premise. You scrub and slough at night, apply a treatment, and unless you're planning on rolling down hillsides or digging ditches in your sleep, there's no reason to wonder why skin would 'dirty' itself overnight. There are some experts who claim that the skin purges itself of toxins while you sleep, so a morning cleanse is essential; others who argue that skin is in a constant state of flux and does not do any more purging at night than it does during the day. In any case, a good splash with warm water should be enough to rinse off the rubbish - right? Well, I don't have a conclusive answer - just my own experience, which showed me that there was no significant difference in my skin when it got demoted from a twice-daily to a once-daily cleanse. NO spottier. NO oilier. NO drier.

My little travel-sized pot of cleanser is still going strong... for once, saving my skin is also saving me money.