#125 Forget Paris

When travelling I like to pack a bag of untried goodies which get a trial in the hotel bathroom. I always seem to have more time to test, and also the inclination, thanks to more nights out and days spent meeting-and-greeting as opposed to working from home (which is what I do 80% of the time in Londres). On holiday I'll always try at least one new lip colour and something tinted, ordinarily with SPF, to see how coverage fares in other climes.

In the bag that spent 2 weeks with me in Paris were the following:

Dior Hydra Life Pro Youth Skin Tint - my companion tested this on my behalf & used it everyday for 2 weeks. It was imperceptible, feather-light and felt very comfortable on her sensitive skin. It did a great job of covering imperfections & I noticed a real difference in her skin pre- and post-application. I'd try it myself but she went home with it. Cheeky. But surely the surest sign of a top skin treat?

Ellis Faas Creamy Lips - wow. I love lippy - YSL, Chanel, NARS, MAC, Revlon - but this stuff felt too good to be true. I twisted up the pen to get a teeny blob of colour through the firm sponge applicator and it went on like poster paint - utterly faithful to the colour in the tube, incredibly smooth, deeply pigmented but entirely comfortable and light feeling. Heck, it even felt hydrating. And it stayed put. Just not possible to fault this one! I used shade L103 - and loved it - a geranium red that really perked up my face.

And to add to the eternal lip balm quest - I snapped up Caudalie in Paris - just 3euros at the local pharmacy - and it's doing a lovely job too. Wish I'd bought a couple more.

Venus Embrace Razor - okay, so has anyone ever seen that hilarious comedy sketch about the marketing team behind a fictional toothbrush company who are brainstorming the various ways they can get people to buy a new model? They're talking about adding MORE BRISTLES, SQUIDGIER HANDLE, DIFFERENT COLOURS - and then one of them says, 'I know! A tongue cleaner! I bet you we can get people to brush their tongues!' - and you suddenly realise how ridiculous it is that existing companies have in fact made toothbrushes with tongue scrapers attached [ick]. Well, sometimes the razor market seems the most bonkers of all - driven by tireless 'bigger betterdom' - and MOISTURISING STRIPS, SPRUNG HANDLES, AERODYNAMIC DESIGN, RUBBER FINS... and the continual boost in blades seems increasingly comical. I mean - where will the line be drawn? 8? 10? Wasn't 1 enough? Really? Well, I'm biting my sarcastic tongue, because I used the Embrace while away [yep, the new Gilette offering which serves up 5 blades], and it gave me the closest, smoothest shave of my life. It was also remarkably speedy - a single swipe caught every single hair, so both legs & underarms were dealt with in about 2 minutes flat. This one's definitely earned its non-ironic place in my arsenal.

Unfortunately I also had a close shave of a less pleasant kind. Namely after a facial which left me red & blotchy - my eczema being the current bane of my life since becoming pregnant [oh to be one of those pregnant women whose eczema disappears entirely!]. I woke up the next day with the sort of painfully tight skin that has never been my lot in life (grainy and with the fine-lined texture of tissue paper across the cheeks and under the eyes), and completely freaked out. How had my skin gone from perfect to patchy in just 24 hours! I knew I had to bring the allergic reaction back down - felt like my face was on fire, and the redness around my brows, eyes and cheeks was glaring. The first thing I tried was Weleda Skin Food, but discovered it's rather better in smaller doses and not as grand spread all over the face when said face is burning up - that bit too thick & sticky. Inspecting my face again I noticed just how dehydrated the skin seemed, so I layered on ESPA's Floral Water with the Cellular Hydrating Complex. This made a marked improvement - skin drinking it up and cooling down. I also purchased Bioderma Make-Up Remover which worked a treat around my sore eyes [it's a backstage favourite], and tapped some of The Organic Pharmacy Ultra Hydrating Cream onto the driest sorest patches throughout the day. Thankfully [and after a few days of anti-histamine help too], things are almost back to normal. I've also traded out Emma Hardie's Cleansing Balm for the time-being [I have an inkling that the mandarin & orange essential oils have been causing a sting upon my sensitized skin], and returned to ESPA once more for what my skin seems to tolerate as a gentler, less irritating cleanse. Although, I must note that prior to the flare-up Emma H was doing a divine job of making my complexion bright, soft and very very comfy, so this one will be back on the shelf as soon as skin's back up to scratch.

#19 The Fairer Sex...

I’ve not had much experience with men as Mr Malcontent was pretty much my first love. We met when we were still young in mind and body, fresh of face and hopeful of heart. Many years have passed and things are still pretty darn good. The inevitable things have changed – nowadays I rarely bother with the good underwear, he wears a pair of pyjama bottoms with more holes than fabric – in fact, wardrobe-wise, Mr Malcontent is not too bothered. I don’t mind – he has a good eye, skilfully skirting the line between scruffy and sexy and besides, I’ve never really wanted him to be a Hugo Boss man. I’d rather have a H&M boy any day of the week. In fact, the only fine-tuning that Mr M has proved susceptible to is not of the sartorial variety. The change has, in fact, taken place within his cosmetic closet instead. Sod’s Law dictates that Mr M has impeccable, beautiful skin. Clear and temperate with an outdoorsy smattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks – boyish and youthful. He does not look his age. Sod’s Law also dictates that he had never taken an ounce of care with his complexion – when we first met, he was using shampoo as a face and body wash. I think it was Vosene. He was prone to dryness, a bit of eczema and as I entered the beauty arena, my knowledge and access to information filtered down to him. As did my continual product passover. You see, he would never spend more than a couple of quid on himself, but his eyes light up like fireflies when I hand him a bag of new booty. He gets face creams, self-tans, firming gels, eye lotions, lip balms… he has become my official male tester. There have been a few hiccups along the way. He’d been using self-tan as an everyday moisturiser, rubbing it into his eyes and wondering why his hands had turned a bizarre burnt-ochre colour overnight. So now, along with pricey products, I also pass on foolproof instructions first. When something’s good, he’s eager to tell me about it. He really liked Lush Afterlife – a cream that I hadn’t high hopes for. He said it made his dry skin feel comfortable and improved it within days. He also loves Nickel Morning After Rescue Gel. He uses it after a night when he’s struggled to sleep and insists that it makes him look fresher. He’s currently using The Sanctuary Cleansing Facial Wash and Protective 24 Hour Moisture Lotion SPF 15. Sneaky of me to give him an SPF-laden lotion, as he’s loath to apply suncare during the day, but the combination is working well. His skin has been clear and blemish-free for a couple of months now – he used to get the odd spot almost fortnightly. He also favours Caudalie Lip Conditioner (having tried Clarins, Chapstick and Neutrogena) and liked Lancôme’s men’s range too – in particular the face wash. New likes include Kiehl’s Eye Alert, which he’s been patting on in the mornings and the Shu Uemura Depsea Moisture Replenishing Cream – which he went through at an alarming rate. If it weren’t so expensive, I’d have bought him a new pot. At bathtime, believe it or not, he’s cleaned me out of MOP Basil + Mint Shampoo and Conditioner. It’s a great formula for his fine hair and he likes the herby smell (that’s his stifled chef talking), even if I’m not too fond of it. That’s another bonus, not only does he provide me with valuable male insights, but he also Pac Man’s his way through my growing giftbags – clearing space for future finds. And though these insignificant scenarios do not form the core of a stable relationship, it is certainly a flawless foundation for a marriage of cosmetic convenience. A-men.